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I hadn’t planned to venture into this part of my life, but I really need to vent and get this out. This depression is slowly killing me, one day at a time. I hate to be negative, and I’ve really been trying not to be, it’s just so frustrating to struggle so much and feel like I’m not getting anywhere. It seems like no matter what I do, even if it goes away for a little bit, the depression and feelings of pure darkness wash back over me, weighing me down more and more each time. It becomes harder and harder to pull myself up, and I’m beginning to fear that I’m going to drown.

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6 Comments

    • melanie_unabridged
    • Posted February 24, 2012 at 4:01 am
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    Sometimes the first thing you need to do is admit to yourself how unhappy you are so hopefully this is a good step in the right direction.

    I would recommend that you try to figure out WHAT is making you so unhappy. If it’s something you can change, do it. If not, maybe you’re unlucky and have a chemical imbalance. Either way, I’d recommend trying to find a good counselor to help you.

    I don’t know you at all but I care so if you need a friend, I’m here as much as I can be.

    • Thank you, that really means a lot to me. I’m currently in counseling and on meds, which is a start. There are a few things making me unhappy, but I can really only change one of them….my weight. However, being that I suffer from major depressive disorder, this is damn near impossible some times as the depression holds me back from doing pretty much anything sometimes, let alone getting healthy. But i’ve been doing the best that I can.

        • melanie_unabridged
        • Posted March 4, 2012 at 10:16 pm
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        Sorry, I just saw this comment.

        I too struggle with my weight! Truthfully, if you can first focus on getting yourself walking–start with a 10 minute walk and add a few minutes here and there, you’ll enjoy the exercise. They say that exercise is really good for your body and it always puts me in a better mood. It helps with energy too.

        It’s really hard to deal with your body making your life hard sometimes. You can’t just say, “Okay, today I’m going to be happy,” and it all be roses and butterflies. But you can try to think one positive thing, “Today, I’m going to eat one healthy meal,” or “Today, I’m going to write something that I like,” or “Today, I’m going to exercise.” Then hopefully, it can help you with the chemical hell your body is putting you through.

  1. I’ve been there too, for whatever it’s worth (and I do think commiseration is worth something).

    Very often, just recognizing these things within yourself will go far in helping to overcome.

    Introspection is a virtue.

  2. I realize I’m commenting on virtually everything today, and not just your posts.

    I have a Post-It note on my file cabinet, which is next to my computer desk, that lists “Mood Boosters.” There are days when I am stuck and none of them help; there are days when they do.

    The advice above is also good stuff and I won’t repeat any of it.


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